Feelings

Can anyone tell me why when some I know is sad I get sadder, like really sad, I sit around with my head down and smoke, in the rain, with my ipod choosing only the saddest songs on there, its like I'm trying to make myself as sad as them, like its a challenge, i have to be the saddest no one can take my crown of depression king, or queen, i dont know the point is i hate being like this, being away from my friends when they need me the most, being away from my girlfriend when she cries and i cant do anything all i can do is sit on the other end of the phone an pray all her problems leav like some sort of emotional magic wipe, and i'm so wrapped up in worrying about others problems then i dont stop and look at my own, i hate this place, i hate it, i want out, i just want her, thats it, even for one day, i could really use it right, just to hold her, thats all i want, but nope, come tomorrow ill wake at 0730 on my own, get ready go to work and text her after, and the people there think i'm crazy cause i go over my 100 texts a day talking to her, they dont understand, no one does, oh well...